How to deal with grief and trauma

In the latest episode of "Laughing Through the Pain," Nathalie Himmelrich shares her transformative journey through grief and trauma. The episode delves deep into the complexities of grieving and offers invaluable insights for anyone navigating loss.

Nathalie Himmelrich, a holistic counselor with a postgraduate diploma in psychotherapy, brings a wealth of professional training and personal experience to the table. She is also trained in somatic experiencing and polyvagal theory, which focuses on the body's response to trauma and emotion regulation. Her journey from personal tragedy, including the loss of her daughter and mother, has profoundly shaped her understanding and expertise in grief and trauma.

The episode begins by exploring the foundational concepts of trauma and grief, such as the three E's—event, experience, and effect. These are contrasted with broader definitions from experts like Gabor Maté. The discussion then takes a cultural turn, analyzing how societal norms influence grieving styles. For instance, the British 'stiff upper lip' approach contrasts sharply with more emotionally expressive cultures. By unpacking common themes like disbelief and physical reactions during anniversaries, Nathalie helps us understand how varied and unique each person's grief journey can be.

One of the most enlightening parts of the episode is Nathalie's emphasis on the power of presence over platitudes. Often, well-meaning advice to stay busy can sidestep the emotional healing process. Nathalie argues that being present and offering specific help can make a world of difference. Drawing inspiration from specialists like Bessel van der Kolk, the episode examines the importance of co-regulation and the art of simply being there. Practical strategies for offering empathetic support are discussed, highlighting the profound impact that a compassionate presence can have during moments of grief and trauma.

Nathalie's personal story adds a poignant layer to the discussion. She shares her experiences of losing her daughter Amaya shortly after birth and her mother to suicide just a few months later. These losses have given her a unique depth of empathy and insight that goes beyond professional training. Nathalie describes the phenomenon of "functional freeze," where she was able to function and take care of necessary tasks but felt emotionally numb. This is a common reaction to trauma and loss, and understanding it can help those supporting grieving individuals to offer better support.

The episode also tackles common misconceptions about grief. For instance, many people believe that grieving should follow a linear path or that it should be "over" after a certain period. Nathalie debunks these myths, explaining that grief is a highly individual process. She also touches on the work of Elizabeth Kübler-Ross and her five stages of grief, clarifying that these stages are not a strict sequence but rather different emotions that may be experienced at various times.

Another key takeaway from the episode is the importance of long-term support. Grieving individuals often need ongoing support, not just immediately after the loss. Simple gestures like sending periodic messages, remembering significant dates, and sharing memories of the deceased can provide comfort. Nathalie also stresses the need for open communication and feedback to ensure that the support offered is truly helpful.

Nathalie’s work extends beyond individual counseling. She offers small courses and has written several books on the topic of grief and loss, including "Bridging the Grief Gap." Her approach is holistic, integrating both cognitive and emotional aspects of grieving. She believes that understanding and addressing both these dimensions can lead to more effective healing.

In summary, this episode of "Laughing Through the Pain" with Nathalie Himmelrich is a treasure trove of insights and practical advice for anyone dealing with grief or supporting someone who is. By focusing on the power of presence and empathetic support, Nathalie provides a roadmap for transforming pain into a compassionate presence. Her unique blend of professional training and personal experience makes her a guiding light for those navigating the turbulent waters of loss.

If you're looking for a comprehensive resource on understanding grief and trauma, this episode is a must-listen. It offers not just theoretical insights but also actionable strategies that can make a real difference in the lives of grieving individuals. So tune in, and discover how you can be a compassionate presence for those in need.

Click here to find the episode

https://www.buzzsprout.com/2289623/15305270

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You can find Nathalie @mymissbliss

https://nathaliehimmelrich.com/